Kudos to Christina Aguilera for squeezing out Jordan Bratman’s hairy little monster of a kid (purely speculation, of course, but I’m not putting my money on Max Liron being a cute kid) a mere two weeks ago, but she is seriously not looking good.
Her face is two shades lighter than her neck, the red lipstick is played out, stretch leggings do nothing for her bowed legs, and she needs to wrangle her ginormous boobs back into her shirt? dress? What is she wearing?
Tags: Christina Aguilera, Jordan Bratman, leggings, Max Liron
Everybody pray for Mister Floyd!
My dad is taking him to the vet as we speak for a possible broken leg. Poor little guy didn’t make it up onto the bed when he jumped!
My mom said he’s all wrapped up in his bed like it’s a little stretcher and had to be carried out to the car.
So sad!
EDIT: Good news. Mister Floyd has a bruised shoulder, but no broken bones. We visited this evening, and took him a special doggie treat, and he seems to be recuperating nicely.
Remember when I said Mike was spending a night out on the town that included a stretch Hummer and a strip club? Well, I found photo evidence on MySpace, and some of them are pretty funny.
He actually looks like he’s having a good time and at least he wore his wedding ring.
Mike went to a friend’s 21st birthday party last night, which he was leary about going to in the first place since they were meeting at a bar because somebody’s mom worked there.
I get a text message from him around eleven that says “now a white stretch Hummer is involved”, and I just have to laugh, because I know he was like a turd in a punch bowl the whole night riding in a Hummer and having someone’s mom sling him drinks. How classy.
EDIT: It gets better…they ended up at a strip club!
My mom and I both have dachshunds that we love and adore. We feel safer with them in the house and we think of them as our own personal alarm systems. As my mom has been quoted saying “Floyd barks when someone farts.” It’s true. They both bark at the slightest noise, especially at night when the house is quiet. Their barking may deter someone from breaking in if the person on the other side of the door or window doesn’t know that it is just wiener dogs barking, but they are not protection dogs by any stretch of the imagination.
Protection dogs, like those trained by Command Control K-9, are highly skilled animals who follow commands and offer a true sense of security. They typically German Shepherds, Dutch Shepherds, and Belgian Malinois, all dogs who are known for their loyalty and companionship, and only the top 1% of the breed is good enough to qualify as a protection dog. They build a bond with the person or family they are protecting and would put their life on the line for their owners. Not that Floyd or Oliver wouldn’t, but I don’t think he would stand a chance against an intruder.
These dogs and the protection they provide come with a hefty price. Max, the current featured dog, is for sale for $35,000!
