Eat All The Cheese
This is a bit of an unrefined rant, but let’s just go with it. It’ll make me feel better to hit publish. The July issue of Marie Claire also makes me feel better. If you have it handy, read Joanna’s Journal and “What I Miss About Being Fat” by Sarah Elizabeth Richards.
When I lost the weight, I got a harsh reality check. I was still me with the same problems. I was just smaller.
I remember being a size 8 in college and being told if you just lose 10 more pounds…Then I’ll fart glitter? I’ll get to eat fudge and fly around without a care in the world? What could possibly be so much more wonderful at 130 pounds than it is at 140 pounds? Or 200 pounds, for that matter.
If you insist on talking about my weight problem, I’ll insist on talking about your sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong problem. Yes, I’ve had my thyroid checked. No, I don’t have PCOS. No, I don’t eat ho-hos and ding dongs all day. I’m not complaining about how awful I feel about myself nor does my flat ass have absolutely any impact on your life, so zip it. Likewise, I don’t want to commiserate with those trying to lose “these final 10 pounds.” I have nothing to say about your cheese eating guilt because I don’t have any cheese eating guilt. Eat all the cheese, is what I say!
It continually miffs me that I can order the same portion of the same meal as anyone else, yet from time to time I feel the “would you like the lunch portion?” judgement where there’s none directed to the other side of the table.
I can talk about food all day long – restaurants, recipes, photography, food blogs – but the minute someone starts talking about their latest prepackaged diet or some magic powder they’re sprinkling all over perfectly good food, I shut down. I don’t want to spend my life dissecting every morsel I put into my mouth – eat fresh, eat well, and don’t worry about it. This isn’t about fat acceptance or throwing your health to the wayside. It’s about doing the best with what you’ve got and being happy with it.
So, this is it. This is what you get. Stop judging me because you’re unhappy with yourself.