Dating Deal Breakers
Since I’m going to eventually have to date again (I’m actually quite looking forward to it if anyone wants to pencil something in – my schedule is open), I’ve been compiling a mental list of things that I’ll be accessing in potential love interests. My mom says I’ll be alone forever if my list gets any longer, to which I say – I have books, a dog, and a blog. I will never be alone.
That doesn’t scream spinster AT ALL.
So, here are my wants, qualifiers, deal breakers, the things I’ve got my eye on:
- How you treat a stranger is important. Especially pregnant woman, waiters/waitresses, children, and old fogies. Actually, how you treat everyone is important.
- If you drive like an asshole, you are an asshole. A giant asshole if you drive a Texas Edition of any vehicle.
- If you’re car is gross, you are gross. You shouldn’t be able to live for a month off of what is in your back seat.
- I’m a homebody. If you’re a social butterfly, it’ll never work out.
- No video games. No exceptions. If I wanted a teenage son, I would have given birth in high school.
- An equal level of education is highly preferred. Being the smart one in a relationship is just as bad as being the stupid one.
- I don’t give smokers the time of day.
- If you think you’re family is weird, God only knows what I’ll say about them on Twitter.
- If you “don’t get” blogging or Twitter, you “don’t get” me.
- Poor grammar and smiley faces in emails. Delete delete delete.
- Not being able to accept responsibility for anything. The moment you say “but it wasn’t my fault,” it probably was.
- Love me, love my dog.
- There’s a height requirement. The taller the better.
- If your legs or arms are smoother than mine, we have a problem. If you shave your armpits, you’re totally creepy.
- You are, presumably, in your 30′s. Why do you have a roommate?
- Inappropriate use of flip flops. Also known as HOLY CHRIST YOUR FEET.
There are so many more, but let’s start with these. What are your deal breakers? Have you ever let one slide?