This post was written by my friend and coworker, Magdalene. Moving services provided by Bronko Box. Thank you for making her move a lot less terrible!
Moving has been terrible since the beginning of time. Even the shortest move is enough to make you think that early Homo erectus discovered fire and decided against using it because they’d have to to pack up their stone cookware the next time a giant, pointy-toothed cat threatened their cave. Thankfully, there are five universal truths that make moving less terrible.
1. You are free to wear sweatpants and feel disgusting and no one can say anything about it.
The one consolation you have when moving is that you’re allowed to look terrible when you do it. Haven’t showered in three days? Perfect; you’re just going to get more sweaty and sticky anyway.
2. It is totally okay to spend at least half of your time moving on the floor.
You could be on the floor for any number of reasons, including but not limited to: hyperventilating because you’re overwhelmed by how much crap you own, separating things into small piles (but not actually packing anything) because it somehow makes you feel better, taking a “short break” to watch the entire first season of Grace and Frankie, laying underneath the ceiling fan while complaining loudly.
3. There is no better excuse to eat out for every meal.
Moving is the best way to justify spending over $100 on food in two days. Want to try a new restaurant? You’ve already packed all your dishes and cutlery, anyway!
4. Yes, it is fair to ask your friends for help.
If your friends have any common sense, they’ll make up a polite excuse as to why they’re unavailable to help you move in the middle of a Texas summer.
5. No one will judge you if you hire some help.
This could mean hiring movers, but if you don’t have $1,000 to blow, this means renting boxes. I am completely over cardboard boxes because they fall apart and I cannot stand the sound of packing tape ripping off its roll, so I was delighted when Bronko Box offered to let me try out their moving boxes.
Bronko Box delivers sturdy, plastic moving boxes to your door and picks them up from your (new) door when you’re done. The process could not be easier or faster: log on to the Bronko Box website, select how many boxes you want in what size, and check out. The boxes arrived on time with a 20-minute heads-up as promised and included a wheeled frame upon which to stack full boxes because carrying things is too much effort.
The boxes themselves are phenomenal. They’re huge and built to take a beating; I packed all my cookware, including my dutch oven, into one and the thing didn’t so much as bow! Each box has handles for easy transport and lids that lock. The only way packing could be more manageable is if someone else did it for you.
As The Man was rolling boxes out the door, I asked him how he liked the wheels. In true man fashion, he simply said “It’s good.” When pressed to elaborate, he continued, with sass: “The wheels are very robust. It’s easy to roll heavy things around because they’re quality, not crappy.”
That adage applies for the entire Bronko Box experience. All of it is quality, from the boxes to the customer service team. None of if it is crappy. Bronko Box delivered on all of their promises, and none of it required more effort than was necessary. Bronko Box is a stress, sanity, and time saver.
